Saturday, August 8, 2015

What Happened . . .


POSTED ON FACEBOOK EARLIER TODAY: Usually, when I post that I'm off for a ride, it's so that those peeps who might try to get a'hold of me over the next few hours--particularly my children--will know that I'm not ignoring them, I'm just off the grid for a while. Today, though, I was reminded that there are those people in my life who, upon seeing that Sam and I are going to be out and about, will always offer up a quick prayer for my safety--and the Saint's, as well, if I'm riding with him. Thank you. After today, I will never take that assurance for granted. This evening it is by God's hand--quite literally--that Sam and I are back at the Casita, safe and sound. Beyond a shadow of doubt, by God's hand, people. I'll post details later, but for now, again, thank you. And thank You.


As I sit here at the Saint's desk, hours on the other side of What Happened, I'm just now realizing that despite my usual ease with words, I'm a little afraid that I won't be able to capture and corral the right ones to convey what I experienced this afternoon. But I have to try; I feel compelled to try, so I will give it a shot. (If you know me, you know I am rarely at a complete loss for words, even at those times when I—and everyone around me—would probably be better off if I were.)

It happened in on Hwy. 35 S. in Alvin, and it was a good thirty to forty minutes later—somewhere on the outskirts of West Columbia—that I finally felt quite confident that I would not, after all, need to pull over onto the shoulder and throw up.

I don't know that What Happened was a near-death experience as much as it was a near-”terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day”-with-life-altering-crippling-and-maiming kind of experience. (Unless, of course, as the Saint, responded, “Well, if the truck behind you had then run over you . . . ”. Well, yeah, then I guess if you look at it that way, it could've been a near-death experience.)

An SUV pulled over into my lane. While I was still using it. (The lane, that is.) I almost wiped out. But I didn't. There. That's it. That's what happened. A near miss, but a miss, nonetheless. That's all it was.

But that's not all it was.

Or at least it sure didn't feel like it when I was in the middle of it. And even more so when I wasn't in the middle of it anymore. When I was just on the other side of it. When, at the next traffic light, after the driver of the SUV and I had spoken to one another through her rolled-down passenger window, I finally was able to pull over into a commercial driveway on the far right side of the road, where the Saint was waiting for me.

DID YOU SEE THAT?”

No, I just looked in my rear view mirror, and saw that you weren't there [behind me] anymore. What happened? Are you okay?”

Yeah.” I wasn't, but I wasn't dead either, so the default response kicked in. “Yeah. I'm okay. But, ohmigosh . . . you didn't see what happened?”

And I tried to explain it to him. The SUV was coming into my lane. Not ahead of me but into the space already occupied by me and Sam. I kept thinking the driver would see me, but (as she later explained) she obviously didn't, and in that split second I had between letting her hit me and trying some other Hail-Mary maneuver, I couldn't think of where Sam's horn was for the life of me (almost too literally there). I grabbed the brakes with my right hand, hoping to slow Sam down enough to somehow give the SUV space to clear the bulk of Sam (who, it must be noted was bearing the bulk of me), even if it clipped our front tire.

YES! FRONT TIRE INTACT! OH CRAP! [Rough translation.] BACK TIRE NOW SKIDDING AROUND TO THE RIGHT AS IF TRYING TO CATCH UP TO FRONT TIRE. IN RESPONSE, FRONT TIRE LURCHING TO THE LEFT. I'll go for the shoulder. OH, CRAP. [Loose paraphrase.] NO GRASS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE SHOULDER—A FREAKING CONCRETE CURB! NO MERCY THERE. OVER-CORRECT TO THE RIGHT, AND WE'LL JACKKNIFE INTO THE ROAD, AND THE TRUCK BEHIND US WILL PROBABLY RUN OVER US. WITH NO CORRECTION, THOUGH, WE'RE GOING TO HIT THE CURB ON THE LEFT, AND DEPENDING ON HOW HARD WE HIT AND AT WHAT ANGLE, I'M HITTING THE STREET. [Notice there is no we beyond slamming into the curb—any kind of curb-hitting action means I'm going to be ejected from Sam in one direction or another.] ENGINE GUARDS DRAGGING ACROSS CONCRETE. FOOTBOARD DIGGING INTO CONCRETE. SCRAPING SCREAMS THAT WE'RE STILL UPRIGHT. MORE SCRAPING SCREAMS THAT AT ANY SECOND WE MIGHT NOT BE. HANDLE BARS CONCURRING, TRYING TO JERK AWAY FROM MY GLOVED GRIP.

And then it was over. I was back on the smooth asphalt of 35 S.

I was alive. Neither Sam nor I went down. We were okay. The shiny side was still up. And all I can think for that moment was How did I do that? How in the world did I do that?

And I knew the answer immediately: I didn't. I didn't do that.

The God of the Angel Armies—and the God of This Motorcycle Mama—had reached down and taken control of Sam, and all I had done was hold on for the ride. The laws of physics tell me so. The adequacy, but not expertise, of my own riding ability tells me so.

I know that some of you will think that I'm being overly dramatic here, but you weren't there. You didn't see what happened. Even the Saint didn't see it, and part of me wishes he had so that he could truly appreciate the incredibleness of it. (Of course, the other part of me is glad he didn't see it because had he seen what was happening, he might have become so distracted that he might have wrecked, himself.) But the drivers around me saw it. And either they think the old lady on the motorcycle is one bad-ass biker chick who has crazy-like mad bike skills, or they drove on thinking the same thing I did: Whoa! What just happened? I thought for sure that lady was a goner. And while the lady driving the SUV didn't see me before she changed lanes, she saw the aftermath in her rear view mirror, and, I think, understands what happened.

My staying upright on that bike was not of this world.

Not of this world. Sam has sported those decals since the second week I owned her. Initially the reason wasn't very spiritual. I dropped her the Pasadena parking lot of a Mexican restaurant the second day I had her, and when I discovered that the metallic maroon fingernail polish I bought to cover the resulting boo-boo wasn't going to quite do the trick, I resorted to the decals. They fit perfectly along the curves of Sam's front fenders where the injury occurred, they looked cool (remember, as the mom of three girls, I learned early that cuteness is everything), and I liked the message. My citizenship lies elsewhere. I am not of this world.

Not of this world.

That's something I've been talking about a lot with Papa-God lately—specifically what that Not of this world means for me. I've had to be honest with Him about my fear of what His answer might entail. (I don't do so great at being not of this world when it means a change in my comfort zone. Oh, yeah, I'm real big into the comfort thing. I like things my way. I want what I want when I want it. I'm don't get super excited about changing my agenda to fit His if His agenda isn't what I already had in mind, and . . . well, you get the picture.)

Today God spoke. And I listened. And we talked about what it might mean to be not of this world. And yeah, it was still kinda scary. But not as scary because I was reminded in a very tangible way that He holds me in His hands. And as an old song I love says, nothing there can touch me except Him.

Regardless of which side is up—shiny or not—I am safe and secure because I am not of this world.

Thursday, June 19, 2014



It is summer--Praises be to Papa-God!--and I have taken over St. Michael's desk this morning while he's on the golf course and Grand-boy and Grand-diva are at Vacation Bible School this fine Tuesday morning.  (For this week each summer, Casita 422 is known as "Camp Casita," where grandbabies come to spend the week with Papa and Jaja, go to VBS in the mornings, and have wild adventures with Jaja--moi--in the afternoons.)

I've semi-connected (I am ADD, y'know) with GoodMorningGirls.org to participate in their summer Bible study, I Am Loved.  One of their study methods is to "SOAP" Bible passages that we read.  This is involves 1) writing out the day's focus passage ("S" is for Scripture), 2) observing (that's the "O") as much as I can about the passage (who wrote it? Who is the intended audience? What words stand out to me?, etc.), 3) determining how Papa-God desires to speak to me through this passage and how I can apply ("A") it to my life, and 4) praying (yup, there's the "P") over the passage--praying Papa's words back to Him, asking that it speak to me and work in my heart as the Spirit leads and directs.  

Pretty cool, huh?  So I thought I'd use my SOAP reflections as a catalyst for some long-overdue writing.  (Oh, I've been writing, sweet peeps, just not here, and, truth be told--ALWAYS, please!--just not enough.) Just giving you a heads-up on the format . . . okay, here we go!

Scripture:
"Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour " (1 Peter 5:8).

Observations:
Paul is writing to--WHOOPS!--Peter is writing to Jewish Christians who've been driven out of Jerusalem and "scattered" (as seeds to be planted, according to the Greek) throughout Asia minor. It's encouragement written for not only them but for all of us Jesus followers. (Second observation: I need to remember that Paul did not write the entire New Testament!  My bad!)

Satan is our enemy. Yes, we know that. In fact this is one of those verses so well known and oft-quoted that if we're not careful, our brains might disengage from the depth of its truth and switch to automatic pilot--blah, blah, blah; yeah, I know this one; c'mon folks, tell me somethin' I don't know already--and take its message for granted. But if I stay focused, asking Papa to give me fresh spiritual eyes and ears this morning, the first thing this metaphorical description reminds me of is that Satan is no pussycat. Like a "roaring lion," he is not interested in becoming anyone's domesticated pet--he cannot be tamed, and he will do what lions in the wild do: He will stalk his prey, waiting for the right moment to make his move, and then attack with one purpose in mind--to destroy. I must never forget that.

I can't help but shift right on into Application here because--dang!--I've just been smacked right in the face with the realization of how often I've foolishly thought I could "tame" this big cat. Whoa! 

Truly, how many times have I thought that I could "manage" something--make it my "pet"--when I should have seen for what it was:"wild and dangerous" and certainly, for all my foolish bravado, absolutely beyond my ability to take for a simple walk around the block. (Think about it, even a trained lion-tamer uses a whip, a stick, or a chair to maintain a certain distance between himself/herself and the animal in the cage. What in the world made me think I could put a collar on the darn thing and take it for a leisurely stroll around the neighborhood?) 

Sin. Yup, how many times have tried to make a personal pet of it?  Tried to play just "a little bit" with it?  Thought, on my own, that I could tame it.  Anything not to have to see it for what is was--for what it is--something that stands ready to pounce and devour me.

No. The devil is not my playmate, and his schemes are not to be my play-things. Not if I intend to remain whole and healthy.  Not if I am to be holy. Not if I am to be "the righteousness of God" (2 Corinthians 5:21).  

Whew.  I didn't expect to get all that out of that short, yeah-yeah-I-know-all-that passage this morning. 

Praying:
Spirit, give me Your eyes to see the enemy for who and what he is.  Make me sensitive to the seriousness of his schemes and their resulting destruction if I am not alert and steadfastly vigilant in my watchfulness.  In those areas where I have let my guard down, stir me to fresh awareness that leads not only to a sober understanding of the danger of thinking that I can play with my pet sins and remain unharmed; help me to let go of any illusions I have of being able to stand firmly and safely on my own, apart from You. Instead, give me a heart's desire for complete obedience to and reliance on You . . .  Amen.


Pamm



Thursday, December 12, 2013

Adventures at Becca's Place!

This is just the start of the fabulous eye candy on display over at Becca's Adventures in Decorating!


Another predominantly white house that makes me drool! 

Baby Daughter and Sailor Man are moving home later this year, and they'll be receiving my current dining room table and buffet as a house warming gift.  The set belonged to one of her closest childhood friends, and when her family moved across town to a bigger, fancier house, Childhood Friend's mama GAVE the set to me (we don't do bigger or fancier at our house). I promised long ago that when Baby Daughter had her own place, it could go to live with her.  I'm already thinking about how exciting it would be to find as a replacement a big ol' hutch to paint white like this one in Becca's sitting room!

When you get a second, run on over to Becca's for a taste of Adventures in Decorating.

Enjoy!



Pamm




Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Mutual Admiration

Meeting Sam for the first time . . . love at first sit!
There's a bike that's sometimes parked at Arlan's Market when I go past there, and whether I'm on Sam or driving Coretta Grace (whole 'nother story), I always have to rest my eyes on her for as long as is safely possible at 45 mph . . . I mean, she's parked there right out in the open--up front and center beneath the shopping strip sign, for Pete's sake--just begging to be lusted after admired by all who pass by . . . a Triumph with a 1600cc engine and custom paint job, she is gorgeous!

The owner--he works at Arlan's--struck up a conversation with me one afternoon as I was leaving the store with Sam and he was outside on a smoke break. (Bikes, of course.)  As I pulled out of the parking lot that day under his watchful eye, I was reminded once again of the respect bikers generally have for one another.  Doesn't matter how big (or small) your engine is, or how many dings (or, sadly, askew handlebar caps) your baby has, another rider--at least what I think of as the real-deal rider--is just happy for you that you're out there riding, doing the same thing (s)he's doing.  There's always a connection between two people who are past the wishing (thank you, Sara Groves) and actually out there riding the wind and living the life.

A great lesson, well worth remembering, for all of us who are sometimes tempted to compare the size of our engines or the state of our paint jobs.

Still grinning, from first to fifth,

Pamm